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During this years Advanced Course with Michael Neill – which I’m attending – Michael said the following which resonated deeply within me:

„When we rest in our health, we become healthier.
When we rest in quiet, we become quieter.
When we rest in beauty, we become more beautiful.
When we rest in peace, we become more peaceful.“

I found that to be absolutely true in my life. The more I put my attention on peace, the more I saw it and the more peaceful I became. But another thing came to my mind. What really is health? Is quiet? Is beauty? Is peace? And how do we rest in it?

I’d like to look at it from a different angle.

How many times do we retell some not so nice event in our head. Including all the related emotions like anger, shame, sadness. And that’s all we do. We don’t resolve it, get new ideas or whatever. We just go over the same event again and again. And our bodies are flooded with stress hormones. Which is known to have a bad effect on our health if happening to often and for longer periods of time. So – how healthy is that?

How many times do we switch on the TV or our mobile devices when there is nothing to do. When there is silence? We distract ourselves with noise and business. How quiet ist hat?

How many times do we look at our refelction in the mirror and only see our „flaws“? Only have critique for ourselves? Is that beauty?

And how many times do we say nasty things to our loved ones because they didn’t behave the way we expected? Even if they didn’t do anything wrong we pick on them. How peaceful is that?

I would say it’s pretty easy to rest more in health, in quiet, in beauty and in peace. Just watch yourself. You don’t have to do anything about it. Just being aware that we do these kind of things will already change it. At least that’s my observation.

In my last meditation course – as we were just talking about how we don’t have stress but make it up – there was a question about cleaning the house:

Everyone knows a scenario like this or similar. It can be cleaning your piled up desk or a big project you want to finish. You really planned to get it done but than you just stand or sit and can’t move a finger. And your thoughts start to go crazy „Where should I begin?“, „It’s just too much“, „I’ll never get it done“, „I’m too stupid“ – which makes you feel overwhelmed. Or „Why is it always me?“, „XY could also think about that“, „And I’m the idiot doing…“ – which makes you feel really angry.

 

For someone watching from outside the situation is clear: 1. It’s just not that much to do 2. Just start with A and than do B 3. It’s not always us

And actually everyone knows that and knows how to deal with stuff. It’s just when we label something as „important“ we start to tell a story around what we are up to. Why it is important. Why we can’t fail. What other people think about us. Why we have to do it. It starts with the dinasours and ends with our grandchildren. And it’s only this story that takes our energy. We are so busy talking to ourselves that we don’t have energy left to actually do something. And all those feelings that come with the story also take our energy.

The solution: See it! Take an honest look and see it’s just a story you make up. Ask yourself if all those things you’re telling yourself are really really true. I mean REALLY! So you think the other person might think bad off you if you don’t clean up. Maybe. You can’t control what other people think. It might also be the other way round because they get suspioucious when it’s too clean. But it’s not really what the other person might or might not think. It’s your conclusion about it. „If they think that I’m not a nice person they don’t want to hang out with me anymore and I’m all alone“. That’s what you are afraid of – rejection. So look at it. Is it really true that you will be ALL alone?

And as soon as you see this story and that is has nothing to do with cleaning but with a fear of rejection you can let it go. And than you are free to do what you decide to do. Which may be relaxing on the couch – but not because you were immobilized but you decide it’s not so important to clean up.

Leave a comment to tell your stories for others to learn.

Yesterday I got one of those advertising brochures with lots of cute things for kids. A bit out of boredom - a bit out of "maybe I find something useful for my daughter" I flipped through it. There was nothing special in it. Clothes, suitcases, stuff for the car. But when looking at the shirts I was taken aback and looked a bit closer. They had beautiful shirts in vibrant colors - obviously two for boys and two for girls. Because: there was a green one with a printed wolve, a blue one with an eagle. And violet one with a butterfly and and pink one with a horse. Slightly annoyed I asked my husband if it's impossible to offer a pink one with a wolve or a blue one with a horse. His answer made me think: "Well - when doing job advertisement we now have to write female/male/diverse. But it's just kids so it's okay to discriminate against them."

Wow! He's absolutely right! Actually we should sue all those companies because of discrimination. Just because they are kids it's okay to put them in boxes? And as soon as they turn 18 they are supposed to "be as they are"? Okay - kids aren't "allowed" to wear blue or green shirts with butterlies and horses. Or violet and pink ones with wolves and eagles. They are just girls and boys. And girls are supposed to be pink, horse, Barbie and glitter. And boys are supposed to be blue, dinasaurs, cars and swords. (I admit it's not that extreme any more, but still very present. And it really is difficult to find something with glitter which is not pink or violet.)

We are still light-years away from equal rights and equal chances. Because it starts with our kids. As long as we put them in pink and blue boxes and don't see that first and foremost they are little human beings. Human beings with different and unique intrests and talents. In our Kindergarten there are boys who love pink and nail polish. And there are girls, wrestling more fiercely and climbing faster than the boys.

Why can companies discriminate against kids without being punished although our constitution strictly prohibits it?

Sooner or later you stumble upon forgiveness when engaging in the fields of personality development, self love or spirituality. Also in psychotherapy it's talked about. Yesterday I repeatedly discovered the big difference between understanding something intellectually and having an insight. It was kind clear to me why it's useful to forgive myself and others. As long as I haven't forgiven completely those bad feelings keep lingering and poisening my life. Yesterday I such a big insight into forgiveness - honestly I cried because it went so deep. I saw that I really can't love myself or someone else truely if I don't forgive. Those feelings which keep me from truely forgiving stand between my love and myself or the other person. They prevent my love from getting where it's supposed to go. Or if my love reaches it's destination it's deformed. Crumbled. That's the one thing. The other thing is - there is nothing to forgive! Really! Whatever I (or the other person) did which is regarded as "bad" was done from a place of innocence. Innocence because I didn't know what else to do. I didn't know better. I was helpless, lost. And in my head there was just noise. Millions of thoughts keeping my inner wisdom from coming throug. So how could I have been able to act wiser? I couldn't. That's why there is nothing to forgive because I acted innocently unknwoningly.

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